It’s not easy to talk to your healthcare professional about your vulva. You really have to put on your big girl pants to go and have a conversation about intimate health. But if you’ve been to see someone and felt unsupported, it can be really demotivating.
We want you to know that there is help out there and you shouldn’t have to just put up with discomfort. You deserve a comfortable vulva, dammit.
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Gynaecologist tips for talking to your doctor
We spoke to consultant gynaecologist and menopause accredited expert, Anne Henderson, to get her best advice for talking to your doctor about intimate dryness.
With over 30 years of experience, Anne is the Founder of The Amara Clinic, where she and her team of specialist menopause GPs help women with these issues every day. Here’s her 5 top tips for getting the most out of a consultation about intimate dryness.
1. Pick your advisor carefully
It’s important to pick someone with experience of this kind of issue, so do your research. Some GPs have a specialist interest in women’s health. If you’re looking on a practice website, check if anyone has RCOG after their name, which indicates they’ve trained with the Royal College of Obstetrics and Gynaecology.
As well as picking someone with expertise in intimate health, you should try to pick someone that you feel comfortable with. You need to be able to relax and feel like you can have an open conversation. Some women prefer to speak to other women about intimate issues, which is absolutely fine.
It’s also worth checking if there are any practice nurses with special interests in intimate health at your surgery, if you don’t feel like any of the GPs are the right person to speak to.
2. Be honest
Don’t try to beat around the bush, otherwise the person can’t really help you. As uncomfortable as these conversations can be, your healthcare provider needs to know exactly what’s going on to work out appropriate treatment options. It’s good practice to use anatomical words so you can pinpoint exactly where you feel discomfort.
As women, we often have the tendency to downplay what we’re going through because a million other things need to get done in a day. But it’s important not to understate how you feel. If intimate dryness is having a big impact on your sex life, your wellbeing or your confidence, don’t be afraid to include that context.
3. Don’t take no for an answer
Your healthcare provider doesn’t have to live in your body and doesn’t know how much your symptoms may be impacting your life. You never have to just put up with intimate dryness, so don’t let anyone make you feel like there isn’t a solution.
If you don’t feel supported by the first person you see, pick another practitioner. There may be a treatment that you’d really like to try that just isn’t appropriate for you, for whatever reason, but you’re always entitled to a second opinion, and should always be given alternative treatment options.
4. Be prepared for an examination
It may be the best course of action for a healthcare provider to give you an examination, especially if you have other symptoms and they want to get an overall picture of what’s going on.
Everyone has their own personal feelings about this. Some women may be totally comfortable with being examined, but others may not be, especially if your symptoms cause discomfort. Go to your consultation knowing that they may suggest an examination, but know that you never have to be examined if you’re not comfortable. If your doctor is male, you also have the right to ask for a female chaperone, if this makes you more comfortable.
5. Go with a mission
Know what you want to get out of the conversation, and prepare a list of questions that you want your healthcare provider to answer. You may have an idea of the sort of treatment you’re looking for, but if not, just tell them how you’re aiming to feel. Going in with a game plan means you’re more likely to get some value from the conversation.
You can do it
It’s our mission at NAYDAYA to make every woman feel empowered, and banish the taboos in women’s health. You deserve to feel great in your skin.